Saturday, May 31, 2008

Almost Day 139!.....34 minutes short.....

Hello everyone. It's Karen. I sat with Jacob on my chest yesterday afternoon before I left for the evening. We sat here and blogged about our morning to get a head start for posting in the evening. I put him down and went to get ready for my nice evening out with my Mom and sister. What follows is what Jacob "said" up until his time of passing, totally unedited....this is what it said and I have not touched it since 1:30 yesterday until now only to preface it with this and explain the facts of his passing. I will follow his words with a few of my own to help you understand what had happened. I do not wish to go too much into feelings and emotions of it all right now....I will later. But for right now, I would just like you all to know what happened....I will try to stick to the facts leaving our feelings out for the time being until I can find the words I want to say.

Day 139~
"I had a really wet diaper in the middle of the night. We thought maybe it was all the fluid moving on out.....well not all the fluid did....Mom changed me when I woke up and there was no urine.....I am still poofy and have the swelling on whichever side I hang out on (dependent edema). I need more wet diapers! I had another hit of lasix....those of you who are concerned about my potassium level....the dosing of lasix I am on is soooo low and mild and most potassium deficiencies happen when people take lasix as a regular med daily at the regular dose.....this is just a small hit for a few days and does not require the supplement at this time....thanks for your concerns.....pray I will not have any adverse effects as I may lose a tiny bit of potassium but hopefully not enough to cause any problems.


We got out the door early this morning and went to Joshua & Jonathan's first baseball practice of the season. It didn't start off to be too great of a day with all the rain and wind but the sun peaked through and we got a whole practice in. I hung out with Mom while "Coach Jason" (that's Dad) helped out the head coach and they were batting, fielding, throwing.....the leagues president came over and checked out my skills and told me I was a future player.....we sure hope so!....for now I will be the bench warmer or bat boy or cheerleader or mascot!....go Cowboy Donkeys! (if you don't' get that joke you need to go way back and catch up...Day 67)

My breathing is a little labored today....my belly is still distended and I am poofy which can both play a roll in making it more difficult to breath. Mom seems a little on edge about it but she is taking good care of me....she tries her hardest and just doesn't want to miss any signs of anything...plus she had to go out this afternoon which is always hard for her to leave me.

Mom headed off to a Ladies Day Out Tea Party...she went with Gramma and Aunt Nancy to celebrate Mommy's birthday (which is tomorrow!). I stayed here and hung out with sleepy Daddy and my big brothers. We



That's it. That is how we left it until we could pick it up later yesterday night. What I had hoped it would say is that he had a great Boy's Night, Mom came home to a mess of wet diapers and we snuggled for the rest of the night. But it didn't happen like that.

Before I walked out the door for my birthday tea, I kissed Jacob on the head and said, "Wait for me baby, I will be home later.....just wait." I walked out the door. I drove down the street and cried. I turned the corner of the road near my home and said while staring at the taillights of the white car in front of me, "Turn around. Go back." But I kept driving. I got to the tea and had a very nice luncheon with my church ladies, sister and Mom. Then I got a phone call. Jason said, "He's not doing good babe." I grabbed my belonging and we got in the van and drove towards my home...we were a half hour away. Jason called again and said, "He's not breathing babe." I told him I would call Nurse Ann Marie. I called her and she said she was on her way. Jason called again...."He's gone, babe."

What was happening at the house: Jason was downstairs with Jacob resting on his chest. The movie ended and Jason, Joshua and Jonathan headed upstairs for a snack while Jacob rested. Jason went to check on Jacob and noticed he wasn't breathing.....he was lethargic and in an apnea spell. He tried to stimulate him but he would not respond. His little body stopped working in Jason's arms. He brought him upstairs to make the phone calls. Jason and Joshua held him and cried together. Jonathan took in the situation from afar.

I pulled in the driveway. I walked up the stairs. I stared at my front door knowing that the home I walked out of was not the same home I was walking into. I opened the door. Jonathan greeted me by saying, "Jacob 's dead." My baby's body lay there in the arms of my loving tearful husband. I took his cold body and just held him. I rubbed his head with my cheek like I did everyday. I rubbed my nose with his with no response from him. I just held him on my shoulder where he spent a majority of his life. He fit so perfectly. Jason had already taken his feeding tube out. I took his body into the bathroom and took the adhesive off his chin. I bathed him, put lotion on him, clothed him and then held him. Nurse Ann Marie arrived. We took a few hair clippings, took some pictures and trimmed his nails. Nancy and Kevin (my sister and her husband) came in to hold him and then my parents. Pastor Joe, Pastor Jon and Amy stopped in. Jacob's nose began to drain some. Nurse Ann Marie, Nancy and I struggled to find anything to hold it back. We finally did and also placed a bib on him as to not stain his outfit. We told Ann Marie that it was ok to call the funeral director. It wasn't ok but if we waited for it to be ok, he would have never been called. Time passed slowly. We held him and cried and already missed his noises. The boys kissed on him a bit. Ann Marie waited outside for John, the funeral director, to show up. John came in and introduced himself. I held Jacob's body tightly in my arms. My family kissed Jacob one last time each, then Ann Marie kissed him. Jason and our three boys and I walked to the hurse parked in our driveway. John opened the front passenger seat and there on the front seat, he opened the most hideous box. Inside was a white sheet. The boys kissed Jacob. Jason kissed Jacob. I held him so tight. I walked over to the box. I held him tight. I kissed and rubbed his head. I held him so tight. I released my grip, held him over the box and said, "Oh my Goodness..." repeatedly. I finally lowered him into the box. Jonathan put in the box at his feet the black and white books he and Joshua had made for him. Joshua snuggled his stuffed animal bull dog in there too. I held my hand out to grab him and hold him again but knew that was it and I just covered his head with his blanket. John backed out of my driveway. I turned and grabbed Jonathan and said "Just hug me...." repeatedly. He did.

Those are the facts....the facts with no description of the ridiculous amount of emotions that go with each and every statement above. I've left that out. Please do not take offense to the bluntness. My intent is to inform. You know how long it took me to blog my feelings before about all that was going on. If you stick with us for a bit longer, you'll hear from my heart and not just the plain facts. It just may begin as a trickle and then explode into a flood. I have no idea. All I know is that I want you to know the facts like that. Do not stop reading now. Those are the physical things that happened. There are spiritual and emotional descriptions that just will take time. It is very important that you do not stop reading the blog now that you know those physical facts. How we view these events are very important for a true understanding of where we are at.....read the following posts.....

76 comments:

asplashofsunshine said...

Where do I begin with eyes filled with tears. I wish your family peace, love, and in the days, weeks, and months to come, joy. Jacob has brought me joy and will continue to bring me joy for the rest of my days. Perhaps this is odd to end with or to say at all from a perfect stranger... sending lots of love and hugs! I WILL NEVER STOP READING! Thank you for opening up your life.

Dolly said...

It's only 12:40 a.m....I've been praying for you Fahmers! I'm glad I stayed up doing that so that I could read the facts about what happened when Jacob passed. Your family is just amazing, everything that your boys will gain from this experience, it's all just too much to take in at once. My heart is so heavy for all of you, of course the heavy droopy eyelids from the tears don't help one bit. But know that you are all loved very much, and that your love for you son has been so enormous...no one could ever measure up to that, except for Jesus! You gave your all, your every moment, your every breathe to him and to your family through this journey. God is smiling one HUGE smile on all of you right now. He is sooooo proud of all of you!

Blessed be his name...when the darkness closes in...still we will say...blessed be His name!

Tiffany said...

I have been following your story for sometime. I so enjoyed hearing about Jacob's days. I am so terribly sorry about your lose. I promise to not stop reading your blog. I will continue to follow you during this dark time. I am so so sorry.

Story of our Life said...

((((HUGS)))) I am so very sorry. Words can not even begin to describe how sorry I am.

Not sure why I woke up shortly before midnight and was prompted to check in on Jacob this evening.

I hope and pray that hours, days, weeks ahead you will have a peace in your heart that can/will hold you over during these rough times.

Your family is in my thoughts and prayers!!!

(((LOVE and HUGS))))

G

Christi said...

Jacob may not be here in the flesh, but he touched my life and his spirit will live for eternity. I will read his story for as long as you wish to tell it. Thank you for sharing this precious gift with me. I am truly blessed to have "known" Baby Jacob as well as the rest of your family.

Anonymous said...

there are no words to describe how heart broken i am for you, and your family.. to have to place your child in a box, in a hurse.. i can't even begin to imagine the emotions that flooded you and continue too. i am just heart broken, and i am so so sorry for your loss.. so many people are standing in the gap for you as you grieve, and walk through this.. i probably speak for many others when i say that i am not going anywhere, and neither are my prayers.. thank you for sharing his life with so many, for being vulnerable, and allowing us a glimpse into what you experienced with your sweet Jacob.. his legacy has just begun, and there is no telling how many lives have been changed by him, and how many will be..

Anonymous said...

Sweet precious family,
I cannot imagine what you are going through right now. It is ok to 'report' the facts, it is ok to do whatever you feel you need to do today and every day just to get through this.
You will never stop loving him, never stop missing him. Your pain will be carried with you, but I pray that through it all God himself wraps His loving arms around you and brings you to a place of peace and rest in Him.
I have come to love your family from afar. I won't stop ready, infact I will anxiously be waiting to hear all that God is going to continue to do in your lives because Jacob is a part of them.
You are precious. Thank you for sharing such a wonderful story with the world. Thank you for being open, honest and brave. Thank you for being vulnerable.
Until we meet. Cindy ~ Phoenix

Anonymous said...

Karen and Jason - I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious son, Jacob. Since when I first found your site, I have been praying for all of you and your family.

It's amazing how God and the Internet have linked together so many of us who would have otherwise not met. I will continue to pray for all of you as well as your precious sons, Joshua and Jonathan and other family members. I pray that God directs the right people to help Joshua and Jonathan deal with the loss of the brother they so loved.

I pray that all of you feel God's grace and healing. Your son, Jacob, has carved a place into my heart that will always remind me of God's goodness and grace.

Blessings to you - Lynne B.

Amy said...

I wish I had words to comfort you and your family. I sat here reading tonight with tears running down my face and my heart hurting for you each. God has and will continue to use little Jacob to touch many. I pray now that God will hold you tighter than he ever has. Keep writing, we will keep reading!!

ajc4ever said...

Thank you for the facts. Take as much time as you need before blogging about the feelings you felt. I'll definitely not stop reading. I'm praying for you guys...all of you.

Angela in Ohio

Anonymous said...

May the Lord grant you and your family peace. I am so touched by your willingness to share your wonderful family with the world. I have been following Jacob's story for some time and feel connected to you in some strange way. I will say a special prayer for you and your precious family tonight. Thank you for helping me realize how special our children truly are. Angela in Oklahoma

Anonymous said...

My heart and prayers are with all of Jacob's loving family, friends and medical staff, during this extremely difficult time.
Take comfort in the fact that Jacob is now with Jesus and was sent to this earth for a reason. He touched the lives of so many all over the world. Thank you Jacob, for sharing your life with us. Thanks to you precious mother too! :)
He has been united with your loved ones that have gone to heaven before him and you will all be reunited with him again some day.
Take care. Love & hugs
Elizabeth XOXOXOX
from Melbourne, Victoria, AUSTRALIA (who will also never stop reading!)

Anonymous said...

Hi Jacob's precious Mom!
I'm sorry I left 2 comments. I thought my first one had disapeared!
HUGE HUGS to you, Elizabeth XOXO(AUSTRALIA)

Susie said...

Karen, I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am that it happened how it did. It's not the same, but we were asleep when Joshua was gone. If blogging the emotions later on helps you to process, go ahead, but please, if you never want to release the torrent to the internet, leave it for family. I am so sorry... My tears won't stop coming, I can't imagine yours...

Donna said...

I do not have any magic words for you and your family during this time. I just want you to know that you are loved, even though I have never met you and your family, and that I am praying for you.

Donna in AZ

Jack said...

Hi Karen
Thankyou for sharing with us Jacobs passing, writing those details must have been a very difficult thing to do. I keep thinking Jacob is now with my trisomy baby girl (18 wks gestation) who never got to be born. What a beautiful place heaven must be. And what a beautiful time you showed Jacob for his time on earth. I will praying that God watches over you at this sad time. Thinking of you all.
Sharon from Australia

jen in Australia said...

Oh Karen, I am so sorry you weren't there. That makes my heart ache the most. I will keep reading, and lifting you all up to the throne.

Anonymous said...

Fahmers, I am so sorry. Jacob appears to have spent most of his life in somebody's arms, so he knows he was loved so very much. Now he's in the best arms of all... I will continue to read your blog because I know there's so much more we can learn from Jacob, but I will sincerely miss reading it from Jacob's perspective. God bless you and keep you well.

quilter-12 said...

keep writing...work out your feelings. I care.

T said...

Through many tears I wanted to tell you, I won't ever stop reading! Jacob has a part of my heart and always will. Hopefully my Grace is showing him the wonders of heaven.

Michelle said...

Thank you for allowing us to grieve with you.

Love
Michelle

Barb said...

I think Jacob was sharing the love, his Mummy held him in her belly and brought him in to this world and his Daddy held him in his arms while he went to the next world! Everyone else, his brothers, family, doctors, nurses and blog fans all shared the bits in between. ~ Thank you for all sharing Jacob.

Dear Karen and Jason,
How can I stop reading I am addicted to all your boys! I hope you continue to post about Jonathan, Joshua and Jacob and your beautiful family. I wish I could do something for you all to ease the pain or make things easier for you. I will continue to read the blog and pray for you all. ~ Barb in Melbourne x

Marj said...

What a beautiful beautiful person Jacob is. And yes he still is, just not with you but with Jesus. He will always be a part of you. He will always be a part of your family. I could feel your emotion through those hard and painful, incredibly painful facts of that day. My heart aches for you all. I can't begin to imagine what you are going through. I only just found you yesterday. There was something about Jacob that really grabbed me. So beautiful. My heart is breaking for you all. I don't know what to say. It's going to be hard and I am so sorry. May God continue to carry you all through these next minutes, days, weeks, months and years.

Rebecca said...

Oh, Karen. Oh Fahmer family.

We love you. We won't stop reading.

I promise.

Jessica said...

I don't even know what to say guys, because it is such a bitter and yet splendid thing... So sad and heartwrenching to know Jacob isn't in your arms again. But so splendid to know he needs to feeding tubes, no lasix, has no heart, liver, kidney and whatever diseases, and is contemplating His Lord... Sending you all the love an unknow sister in Christ can send... and praying for you always...
Jessica in Italy

Becky said...

Although I do not know you in person, one thing I appreciated from your blog was the fact that you made Jacob a part of your everyday lives - ballgames, etc. He was so deeply loved. Thank you for sharing his life with so many.
I am praying for you.

Anonymous said...

As long as you choose to blog, I will choose to read.
Peace, Heather

Strawberry_Lamb said...

Thank you for sharing the last moments of Jacob's special life with us. I'm so sorry for your loss. I've been reading since the beginning. I pray that the days ahead and more to come bring you all comfort and ease. Greetings from South Africa.

Anonymous said...

It has been so great to be able to share in the Life of Jacob. Thank you for allowing us into your family. I will continue to check your blog, to continue to check on you all. My heart is so heavy for you today, you all will be in my thoughts and prayers for many days to come.

Laurie said...

Thank you for letting us know what happened. We'll be here too as you process all that this little boy has meant to you. He was so precious. You are in my prayers. Laurie

Carey said...

My heart aches along with yours. You and your beautiful family are in my prayers. I wont stop reading your blog, Im here with you.

Anonymous said...

So very sorry for Jacob's passing but celebrating that he is whole and healthy with Jesus! I will keep you close in thoughts and prayers in the days ahead. Your story has been an encouragement to me and I won't stop now looking in on your family and hearing how and what you are up to! Know that Texas is praying for you~

Kristen said...

My heart is breaking for you. :( And don't worry, I will still keep reading. Thank you for sharing so personally with us.

Anonymous said...

I not only love Jacob, I have come to love you all. I will continue to read and pray.

Karen in TN

Mama Grizzly said...

I have been reading your blog for several months and just want you to know that my heart goes out to you and I am praying for you and your family. May God hold you in the palm of His hand....

Jenny said...

I will never stop reading. My heart aches for you and I cannot even begin to imagine your pain. Jacob is such a special little boy. He has made me smile every day with his precious face and just with his amazing story. I am praying and will continue to pray for a very long time. You two are such incredible parents-all 3 of your boys are SO blessed. Love, prayers and hugs, Jenny

Cathy said...

Karen, thank you for the facts as it just seemed so sudden and we all want to understand. Trust me I will continue to check through the days and months and years to come. I can't even see to type so will check back. We are loving and praying and can't even begin to imagine. CAthy & Annabel

mom2LEAA said...

May God continue to surround you with love and give you peace. Your little one's life was such an inspiration to so many and he was a true teacher to those who read his blog. Thank you for sharing his amazing story. I will continue to read and pray for your family. May the joy of his life and smile be the thing that you remember, I know it is what I will.
May God's peace be with you,
Cindy, a reader from afar

Shannon said...

karen,
i love you guys so much. i will continue to pray for you, jason, the boys and the rest of your family. that God will provide the healing and comfort that only He can give.
shannon

Jessica mommy to Alex/ RTS said...

I will continue to pray for you and your family.
People all over the world will continue to follow jacob's blog because he will continue to reach people even from heaven.

Anonymous said...

It must seem like a horrible dream at this point. having lost a child to T-18, I know where you are. You have been through so much. Take your time and start the healing. We will continue to check in on you all. God is good. When we lost our son someone said to me, "Doesn't Heaven seem so much closer sice you have made such a precious deposit?" Our prayers are with you and your family.
Love, The Harpers

Anonymous said...

Spent last night trying to find the "right" words. No luck. Thank you for letting God lead you into sharing your lives with us. Giving Jacob a voice was a wonderful experience for us all.We all fell in love with him and your family. Your family reminds us to have faith constanly! "Live in the Lord". May you feel Jesus walking with you through your grief. At times if you need he will carry you. -Kris C-KUMC

Kim said...

Thank you for sharing what happen. It conveys more emotion than you can possibly realize.

And I'll be here, whenever you write.

I'm so sorry...

Erin said...

I am so sorry..... I do not have any other words... but I send many prayers your way.....
Rest in Peace Jacob....

Anonymous said...

I feel like he is one of my own, I fell in love with Jacob and your family thru your blog and the one time that I met baby Jacob. He will be missed but never forgotten. Thousands are praying for you and your family....I am.....Peace be with you.

Anonymous said...

More tears from a stranger. I fell in love with Jacob soon after his birth. I have a feeling that you'll never know how many people this little guy's life touched. You'll remain in my prayers for years to come. May you feel the Lord lifting you up and carrying you during this most difficult time. I'll be reading as long as you are writing!

With love,
Rochester NY

Dawn B said...

I can hardly type words as my eyes are so full of tears.

I cannot imagine your pain.

Please don't stop writing...you have touched so many lives.

You will continue to be in my prayers.

Destini said...

I cannot imagine how you all must be feeling right now. As I (a stranger) type this, I am fillled with a sense of loss. There is a hole in my heart right now mourning your little man. I appreciate the way you always kept such a Godly perspective. We know God's promises and that Jacob is rejoicing in the arms of our Saviour, but it doesn't really take the pain away. I pray for peace and restoration for your family.

Chrissy said...

I love you all!

Kelly said...

My heart is breaking and I'm overcome with emotion. Thank you for sharing. I"ve become quiet attached to your family and your story. I will certainly keep reading and, most certainly, keep praying! Take care of yourselves during this time.

Best,
Kelly

Laurie said...

Oh Karen and Jason,

You have my heart in this hour, and the hours ahead. I will never stop reading as long as you are still posting. I am with you in this all the way, praying, asking God to carry you and see you through. I love Jacob and he stole my heart. He taught me so much about life and love in Jesus. You have taught me so much about faith and hope.
"In the quiet moments when the hurt is hard to bear, may love become your shelter and the beauty of precious memories be your comfort. You are held in gentle thought and prayer." I love you guys and am praying for you all.

Blessings, Laurie in Ca.

Jessica said...

If those are just the facts, why am I so emotional right now? God bless your heart. You have survived what most people could not. The facts you shared told me that God had you in his arms the whole time. How else could you and your family have gotten through the day. (((((HUGS))))) I will continue to read your blog and lift you up in prayer. From one blogger mom to another...

Christy O said...

I sat here crying, unable to open the blog when I first saw the post and knew what it meant. I am so so sorry, and my sincere prayers are with you all. Keep posting, writing, doing whatever helps you process it as the days go on. Thank you for posting the facts as we have followed Jacob's life for so long, those details were important to all of us. I cannot imagine what you are all going through and so much want to sit and hug you and talk about your darling boy Jacob. God bless you all and may he hold and strengthen you as you go through this.
Prayers and love from Wisconsin

TressaMOMof3 said...

God bless your family as you go through this really rough time. I have been praying for you every night.

Tressa

Anonymous said...

I don't know if I could feel any more strongly for you if you had written the most emotional post of your life. There's almost more emotion here in what's left out, if that makes sense. I know I'll keep reading. My thoughts will be with your family.

Rebecca Batey Fradin said...

Today is the first time I've visited your blog. I've spent about 15-minutes here and you've already touched my life. I can only imagine what you are going through right now - as the mom of a baby with multiple health issues I have imagined and am thankful every day that this is no my reality.

You are all in my prayers.

My best,
becca

sumi said...

This was so hard for me to read. So many memories came rushing back as if they had happened yesterday instead of 15 short (or long, it feels like both) weeks ago. At the time I was not able to lay out the facts like you did, but you made me think perhaps I should write them down in a journal or something.

I went to bed last night re-playing our frantic rush to the hospital, and everything that followed there. I remember pacing outside the emergency room, staring unseeingly at the stuff displayed in a gift shops' windows, and telling God: "Whatever happens, I will still praise you."

I am with you - it sucks. It is the suckiest thing ever. It is such a paradox though: Sorrow mingled with joy, despondency mixed with hope, weeping interspersed with laughter.

I know this: God is faithful and good. I know you are finding this out too. I am praying for you today, that he will envelop you in his strong arms and carry you through the next few weeks.

Erin said...

I almost couldn't read because my eyes where so filled with tears. Again I am so sorry for your loss. I am still here reading just as I have been for many weeks. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

The VW's said...

I won't stop reading and I won't stop praying! Jacob's life had and has a purpose! You are left here to tell about Jacob and Jacob's heavenly Father. What an AWESOME purpose! Please know that I will be here praying for you and God is ALWAYS here to get you through! My heart aches for you, but it also swells when I think about God's purpose for your family and, especially, little Jacob!

madsmom said...

My daughter said she was to sick to go to school today. When i asked her what was wrong she said her heart hurt. Jacob touched our whole family. We feel as though our hearts are broken along with you. We will continue reading so we can remain close to you all especially to Jacob. Praying for you all at this emotional time. God bless, Christie and Madison..

Anonymous said...

My eyes are teared. I don't even know what to say. I just logged on and was devastated. I know he is with the lord. Oh what a precious boy. Thank you for your family for sharing his precious life with all of us strangers. I will continue to read.

with love,
jenn in ca

Anonymous said...

I am so very sorry. I just called my husband at work and told him with eyes filled with tears and a broken voice. He has touched our family deeply.
We will be with you on this journey.
Randi Booth

Brad and Fran Hoagland said...

I am heart broken for you and your family. As I read your post, I am reminded of when my daughter died in my arms, but she was 8. We also held, hugged, bathed and kissed her for hours after, then I couldnt watch as they put her on the stretcher with the sheet over her. That was 11 years ago. The sadness will never go away. It will leave a scar on your heart forever. Right now, it is a gapeing open bleeding wound. With time, it will heal, leaving a scar. You will always notice it and know it is there and it will always remind you of him, but once it is a scar, it wont hurt like it does now. I just want you to feel the love I have for you and your family and the prayers continue.

Genevieve said...

I just found you a couple days ago through Susie's blog (Be Strong and Courageous). I'm not sure why I hadn't clicked before when she mentioned you.

Just wanted to let you know that even a new reader isn't going to stop reading here. God be with you and continue to comfort and strengthen you with Him.

Prayers going up from the Oregon coast.

The Ski's said...

I have come to love your family as I read about your lives daily. As I sit here, I can not see the screen of my computer through my tears. Please know that we will blanket your family in prayer. We hope that you are able to rejoice in the fact that Baby Jacob is at peace watching down on you from above. We pray for a blanket of protection to surround your loving family now and always. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with all of us. Much love....

Jennifer & Tim said...

Still reading. Glued to the screen. I promise I will continue to read. Your story will not go unread. We are waiting with bated breath to hear Jacob's entire story. Thank you for trusting us with it.

Margarete said...

I am very sorry for your loss. I am glad to know though that he is in the arms of Jesus and that someday I will meet him.

Collins Family said...

You tell the events however you can. My heart is breaking as I read this for you all. Do not quit writing and I will not quit reading. You take whatever time it takes and spill you emotions however is best for you. Just know we are praying for you all.

The Adoption Of William said...

Ohhh Hugs. Your little guy has blessed my life. Thank you!

Praying!

With much Love,

Jen

Anonymous said...

Jacob's passing was perfectly planned by our Heavenly Father from the moment he was made. Only he knew his perfect plan. I find it so very special that Jacob went from his earthly fathers arms to our Heavenly Father during his transition.
Karen, you are right, it was not part of His plan for you to be there, and the reason is beyond our knowledge and understanding. You are such a strong woman to understand that and accept it.
I will continue to pray everyday for your family.

i know jacob has passed and this blog is about him, but please...do not stop this blog. even if it is just for others to learn about t18 or for those huge fans of jacob to come on here and tell you of the wonders of God and how he used Jacob as his instrument...i dont care what it is...just dont stop!! Maybe adding a prayer list for other friends of jacob who have some sort of childhood illness and are in need of prayer???

I will still forever remain the biggest cheerleader of the Cowboy Donkeys!!

Amanda said...

I have followed Jocob's blog from the beginning. I am sad that he is longer here for all of us to enjoy and read about, but at the same time I am glad that he is up in heaven free from his restraints. I wish and pray for peace for your family. Jacob was a shining beautiful star, and when I pray,and look up at the stars I will say a special prayer for Jacob and for your whole family.
My entire family reads you blog, my (almost 3 yr old) says can I see baby Jake. She even includes Jacob and his mommy and daddy in her prayers. God Bless you all. We will be thinking and checking in on you (via blog) for a long time to come.

Ginger said...

Dear Fahmers,

I've never posted before, but have been reading Jacob's blog since the beginning. Reading and praying for all of you.

I have not had an opportunity to read in over a week, so wanted to catch up on what Jacob had been up to. The tears just flowed when I found out he had gone to be with our Lord.

Jacob's blog has touched my heart in a way that I cannot even find the words to describe. The faith and hope in each post. And the love. Oh, the love. Thank you for sharing your precious little boy with us.

Your family is in my prayers at this most difficult of times.

Anonymous said...

I saw a link to your blog on a website this morning that someone had posted for prayers. I just sat here bawling my eyes out for you! I'm so sorry for your loss. I wish I could hug you and your family and take all your pain away!

amanda said...

Thanks for sharing Jacob's life and your lives with him through this blog. Just because his physical life has ended doesn't mean an end for me in reading this blog.

I will be praying for you all during the tough days ahead. I miss Jacob and my soul aches for your loss of Heaven's gain, and what a gain that is-a beautiful, precious, adorable, little baby boy Jacob who is so loved.

Patty said...

I don't even know where to begin or how to tell you how sorry I am for your loss. Sending lots of prayers and hugs.

Anonymous said...

I've been offline for a while, and I came back to find this. I'm so sorry for your loss. Jacob was such a special little boy.