Almost Day 139!.....34 minutes short.....

Hello everyone. It's Karen. I sat with Jacob on my chest yesterday afternoon before I left for the evening. We sat here and blogged about our morning to get a head start for posting in the evening. I put him down and went to get ready for my nice evening out with my Mom and sister. What follows is what Jacob "said" up until his time of passing, totally unedited....this is what it said and I have not touched it since 1:30 yesterday until now only to preface it with this and explain the facts of his passing. I will follow his words with a few of my own to help you understand what had happened. I do not wish to go too much into feelings and emotions of it all right now....I will later. But for right now, I would just like you all to know what happened....I will try to stick to the facts leaving our feelings out for the time being until I can find the words I want to say.

Day 139~
"I had a really wet diaper in the middle of the night. We thought maybe it was all the fluid moving on out.....well not all the fluid did....Mom changed me when I woke up and there was no urine.....I am still poofy and have the swelling on whichever side I hang out on (dependent edema). I need more wet diapers! I had another hit of lasix....those of you who are concerned about my potassium level....the dosing of lasix I am on is soooo low and mild and most potassium deficiencies happen when people take lasix as a regular med daily at the regular dose.....this is just a small hit for a few days and does not require the supplement at this time....thanks for your concerns.....pray I will not have any adverse effects as I may lose a tiny bit of potassium but hopefully not enough to cause any problems.


We got out the door early this morning and went to Joshua & Jonathan's first baseball practice of the season. It didn't start off to be too great of a day with all the rain and wind but the sun peaked through and we got a whole practice in. I hung out with Mom while "Coach Jason" (that's Dad) helped out the head coach and they were batting, fielding, throwing.....the leagues president came over and checked out my skills and told me I was a future player.....we sure hope so!....for now I will be the bench warmer or bat boy or cheerleader or mascot!....go Cowboy Donkeys! (if you don't' get that joke you need to go way back and catch up...Day 67)

My breathing is a little labored today....my belly is still distended and I am poofy which can both play a roll in making it more difficult to breath. Mom seems a little on edge about it but she is taking good care of me....she tries her hardest and just doesn't want to miss any signs of anything...plus she had to go out this afternoon which is always hard for her to leave me.

Mom headed off to a Ladies Day Out Tea Party...she went with Gramma and Aunt Nancy to celebrate Mommy's birthday (which is tomorrow!). I stayed here and hung out with sleepy Daddy and my big brothers. We



That's it. That is how we left it until we could pick it up later yesterday night. What I had hoped it would say is that he had a great Boy's Night, Mom came home to a mess of wet diapers and we snuggled for the rest of the night. But it didn't happen like that.

Before I walked out the door for my birthday tea, I kissed Jacob on the head and said, "Wait for me baby, I will be home later.....just wait." I walked out the door. I drove down the street and cried. I turned the corner of the road near my home and said while staring at the taillights of the white car in front of me, "Turn around. Go back." But I kept driving. I got to the tea and had a very nice luncheon with my church ladies, sister and Mom. Then I got a phone call. Jason said, "He's not doing good babe." I grabbed my belonging and we got in the van and drove towards my home...we were a half hour away. Jason called again and said, "He's not breathing babe." I told him I would call Nurse Ann Marie. I called her and she said she was on her way. Jason called again...."He's gone, babe."

What was happening at the house: Jason was downstairs with Jacob resting on his chest. The movie ended and Jason, Joshua and Jonathan headed upstairs for a snack while Jacob rested. Jason went to check on Jacob and noticed he wasn't breathing.....he was lethargic and in an apnea spell. He tried to stimulate him but he would not respond. His little body stopped working in Jason's arms. He brought him upstairs to make the phone calls. Jason and Joshua held him and cried together. Jonathan took in the situation from afar.

I pulled in the driveway. I walked up the stairs. I stared at my front door knowing that the home I walked out of was not the same home I was walking into. I opened the door. Jonathan greeted me by saying, "Jacob 's dead." My baby's body lay there in the arms of my loving tearful husband. I took his cold body and just held him. I rubbed his head with my cheek like I did everyday. I rubbed my nose with his with no response from him. I just held him on my shoulder where he spent a majority of his life. He fit so perfectly. Jason had already taken his feeding tube out. I took his body into the bathroom and took the adhesive off his chin. I bathed him, put lotion on him, clothed him and then held him. Nurse Ann Marie arrived. We took a few hair clippings, took some pictures and trimmed his nails. Nancy and Kevin (my sister and her husband) came in to hold him and then my parents. Pastor Joe, Pastor Jon and Amy stopped in. Jacob's nose began to drain some. Nurse Ann Marie, Nancy and I struggled to find anything to hold it back. We finally did and also placed a bib on him as to not stain his outfit. We told Ann Marie that it was ok to call the funeral director. It wasn't ok but if we waited for it to be ok, he would have never been called. Time passed slowly. We held him and cried and already missed his noises. The boys kissed on him a bit. Ann Marie waited outside for John, the funeral director, to show up. John came in and introduced himself. I held Jacob's body tightly in my arms. My family kissed Jacob one last time each, then Ann Marie kissed him. Jason and our three boys and I walked to the hurse parked in our driveway. John opened the front passenger seat and there on the front seat, he opened the most hideous box. Inside was a white sheet. The boys kissed Jacob. Jason kissed Jacob. I held him so tight. I walked over to the box. I held him tight. I kissed and rubbed his head. I held him so tight. I released my grip, held him over the box and said, "Oh my Goodness..." repeatedly. I finally lowered him into the box. Jonathan put in the box at his feet the black and white books he and Joshua had made for him. Joshua snuggled his stuffed animal bull dog in there too. I held my hand out to grab him and hold him again but knew that was it and I just covered his head with his blanket. John backed out of my driveway. I turned and grabbed Jonathan and said "Just hug me...." repeatedly. He did.

Those are the facts....the facts with no description of the ridiculous amount of emotions that go with each and every statement above. I've left that out. Please do not take offense to the bluntness. My intent is to inform. You know how long it took me to blog my feelings before about all that was going on. If you stick with us for a bit longer, you'll hear from my heart and not just the plain facts. It just may begin as a trickle and then explode into a flood. I have no idea. All I know is that I want you to know the facts like that. Do not stop reading now. Those are the physical things that happened. There are spiritual and emotional descriptions that just will take time. It is very important that you do not stop reading the blog now that you know those physical facts. How we view these events are very important for a true understanding of where we are at.....read the following posts.....

It is with a weird combination of a heavy heart and sense of celebration that we are sad to announce that Jacob went home to be with the Lord today around 5:30 PM. Please pray that his life continues to be celebrated and that others draw close to Christ as a result of his passing.

My Very First Fanmail!

Well Miss Judy is officially the first fan to get me an email with a picture of her and her fanclub stuff! She writes:

"Dear Jacob,This is how I start my day, every morning with a cup of coffee or tea and reading your blog. I love using the cup I got because it is a physical reminder to pray for you and your family.I love you little man, keep being strong.love, grandma judy"

Isn't that AWESOME! I got more pics to show you of my Mommy in her Jacob Gear and me swimming in a Jacobbib... but I'll make you wait in order to build the suspense! I know there's more Jacob Fanclub stuff out there... so send me the pics! I'm especially anxious for a really "BIG" secret project that someone in South Africa is working on for me... I wonder what it will be.... you don't think they'll put my face on an elephant or anything do you? :)

Update on my Poofiness

Howdy. Just wanted to let you know that I went to see Doc today. I weighed in at 6 pounds 5 ounces.....up 7 ounces since last week.....the water retention plays into that so don't get too excited! Doc checked me out and found that my massive heart murmur is not as loud as it usually is.....my cardiologist heard it the other day too. Doc called and spoke with him and they decided that a small dose of lasix daily would be a good idea. The reason for my heart murmur to be like that? It has to do with the amount of fluid pumping to my lungs....Mom is still processing it herself....so once she figures it out and tells me, I will tell you. Why the bloating?....lots of possibilities but nothing that can be nailed down and said to explain it all. I have heart issues, liver issues and possibly kidney issues....all of these make me a candidate for water retention....lasix is actually something that my docs have thought I would need since I was born so it is amazing I've made it this far without them. Doc said that I look good. This whole thing is not a sign of any downward spiral.....it is just something to take care of and move on...that is good. So that is my update. My day is not yet over so I will do my Day 138 update later.

P.S. ~ Oh and Miss Sue...you know who you are......where's my picture of you in your green "Official Fan of Jacob" shirt?!?!

Day 138!

I was a little fussy at 2:00am last night. Mom was not sure why and fed me a little early in case it was because I was hungry....wrong Mommy!....I spit up. I just had some gas and such that was moving around because of the lactulose I was given earlier. I awoke this morning still poofy. We, all 5 of us, headed to see Doc. Jonathan had his 4 year well-visit today and I had my weekly not-so-well-visit. Jonathan did great! He looks good...he's a little on the thin side but because of his good appetite, it's nothing concerning...more entertaining than anything. Then it was my turn to see Doc. As stated in my earlier post, I am on lasixs due to my water retention. Doc explained why my heart murmur was not as loud and Mom didn't understand it all.....so she called later and asked for them to explain again....she still is having a hard time processing....it has to do with the increase in pulmonary pressure therefore harder to hear the swishing of blood?? She'll figure it out and let it sink in, tell me about it and then I will tell you. Sometimes Mommy has a handle on things and then other times it just takes a bit to picture it all....she gets it over time but without knowing all the ins and outs, it takes a little time sometimes. I think she should be awarded and Honorary M.D.!...do they have those?..

After Doc, we went to Wegman's for some lunch and picked up a few things....diapers and bananas....the necessities of life. Then we picked up our van which was at the car doctor and after a minor procedure, it is all better.

I continued to have poofiness go to different places in my body (dependent edema) but nothing too discomforting.

Some of our friends from church came over, Miss Christen and Mr Steve (who actually held me this time!) and brought Mom some yummy soup. Joshua and Jonathan hammed it up for the company and pulled every trick out of their bag.....literally.....they were really silly. Then Miss Sara came for her Jacob fix. She stayed and chatted with Mom all night....it was great company.
Now, I am all drugged up on my meds (nothing too crazy that it makes me loopy or anything), fed, ready for bed.....I am just gunna chill out with my zebra print and Mommy.....that's what I will get Mommy for her birthday!....a zebra print shirt so I will have the best of this world all in one spot!

Pics of the last few days are coming soon.....Have a great last day of May!

Day 137! ~ I'm Pooffy Again!

So my face is fat again...and my butt cheeks are fat.....and just my right hand is fat.....not as bad as last time but it's a poofy start. I was sleeping all morning laying on my right side, not moving much and when Mom went to change my diaper, she rolled me over and my right eye was completely swollen shut!....she was kind of startled and called Nurse Ann Marie and Doc's nurse Marleen. They were both kind of baffled and couldn't tie it to anything....but it is so hard with my condition to know what is going on in the cells of my body and organs and stuff. Nurse Ann Marie said I look fine other than the slight poofiness and even after Mom rolled me over, the fluid must have dispersed throughout the rest of the body because my eye is ok now.....but the fluid can just move throughout and make other areas swollen. Ann Marie listened to my lungs which sounded clear. My urine has been this odd shade of orange for over a week now and no one can figure out why. I am a tough case. All my medical friends give their best and I thank them for that.....I like to give them a challenge. So while I was blimping up , Mom was getting her flower garden together, Dad and I were baking more "Blessed Friends of Jacob Bread," and Joshua & Jonathan where playing with the Millennium Falcon and watching Stewart Little....how those two things go together, we will never know....all us Fahmer Boys are mysterious! So, I am just going to take it easy. Mom is going to rotate me like a rotisserie chicken so I don't blimp up on one side again.....what a great mind image that is! Pray for drainage, wisdom for Mom and Dad, creative thinking for my doctors (since I am not a standard case), and just strength for us all. Thanks guys. Love you lots. P.S.~ Hi fan Leah in Seattle....I hope you are not "Sleepless in Seattle" tonight! I will update as often as I can. Mom & Dad's internet is working now but who knows if that will remain. I will have someone update from somewhere if we learn anything new. Sorry for the delay. Everyone remember: No news is good news. If something is terribly wrong, it will be posted so please do not fear if you have no word of anything.

Prayer Request

I'm retaining water again. We don't know why. I'm seeing the doctor tomorrow. Nurse Ann Marie came out and assessed my situation. I'm acting normal but I'm just poofy.
The possibility of my liver not working right was tossed around. We hope to find out more tomorrow from Doc. Please pray for a quick recovery.
We will keep you updated as much as possible but mom and dad's computer isn't working right. Just be patient and pray. I'll update you when I can. Thank you. Hope to talk to you soon.

Day 136!

I had an ok night. I was a little fussy but Mom had given me some sooper-pooper medicine before bed and it kind of upset my tummy a bit. It didn't work all that well. Miss Ann Marie & Miss Beth came to visit the boys and their intern Abby. They cut out face parts (eyes, nosed, mouths) and put magnets on them so they can stick them to a can and make all sorts of fun faces. They had a blast. While they were busy doing that, Nurse Ann Marie was assessing me with Mommy. She didn't like the size of my belly even though I seem to be comfortable. She called Doc and he apparently called for another water gun fight behind my back! Mom shot me this time right in the butt. She also has me on my medicine again. I seem to be just a little backed up again....not as bad as the last time because I am still comfortable and I was pooping all week....just not enough.

After the water gun battle, Mom took my brothers to get their hair cut with Grampa. They were getting pretty shaggy but that is all taken care of now! Daddy has yet to see them....boy will he be shocked....I'll post some pics of them tomorrow.

We then headed back to Gramma and Grampa's for some dinner and then headed home. I am pretty tired but back to myself enjoying my zebra print and stuff...last week I wasn't going to have any of that not being held bit.

Everyone give someone a "Jacob hug" every day....that is one extra hug just because you can now and you never know when you may again.

Day 135!

I'm not sure if I told you this, but Mommy and I migrated back to the couch. It just was not working for Daddy since he is not used to my noises and, honestly, Mommy is a little too used to my noises and can sleep through lots of them. Daddy just was not resting and he was a bear! So Mommy and I have been back on the couch for the past few nights. It really isn't that bad...ask Mom...she really is ok with it....she is so tired, she can sleep just about anywhere!

We headed out early this morning to go to see my cardiologist. He was glad to see me. He actually visited the blog the one time and that one time happened to be the day I had my real bad apnea spells so he told us today that he will never visit it again!....he gets to see me in person and takes care of me so I guess he can get away with it...he really is one of my biggest fans but he just is in a different way. He actually didn't know about my bad spells these past few weeks....he got onto Mom for not calling him and made sure that if there is a next time of bad days, to give him a call and he will help where he can. He checked me out as well as 3 other residents/interns/docs.....I look and sound as good as I can....no earth shaking news....which is good.

I was sleepy the rest of today and kind of just hung out in my boppy. My belly is getting bigger again.....my nurse is coming by tomorrow to check me out so we'll see what she thinks.

Mom got outside a bit to do some work in her garden. She got a garden cherub from Busia that is a little boy holding a heart as well as a plant called "Jacob's Ladder" and Mommy has my garden stepping stone. So, Mom is out there trying to figure out how to arrange it all to make it look really nice. We'll have pics for you once she has all her flowers and plants where she wants them.

Miss Maureen from CompassionNet came by to catch up with Mom a bit and take care of some of my financial expenses that are not covered under insurance....there are very few but the program takes care of it and we have nothing to worry about. It is great and we are so blessed to be enrolled and served by their services.

Well, I am off to bed....or is it "off to couch"??!?!?!

Day 134! Happy 19th Birthday to Me!

Now I'm legal in Canada! :)

Ok...so I am totally addicted to the new map....I LOVE to see the little light ring flash when one of my totally amazing fans logs on to check on me. Let me give a shout out those of you in my ancestor's country Poland!....I saw there was a hit in Warsaw, Warszawa, Poland.....Busia is Polish and many times she speaks to me in the beautiful Polish language.....she knows lots of beautiful sayings and says them with such affection and love....very honored to have you visiting.....as well as the rest of you.

So I turned 19 weeks tonight. Very cool. Today was the biggest celebration by far....there was this huge parade with lots of my fans, fire engines, police cars, clowns, Irish dancers, armed soldiers.....it was a big to-do. We had our friends, the Reids & Fadales with us to see it all.

Really it wasn't about me....it was about celebrating all the men and women who have fought and who are serving in the United States of America's Armed Forces. Thank you for fighting for our country and freedoms.....I can say "God" and "Jesus" and not fear for my life.....I can worship Him freely and tell others about the great things He has done for me without looking over my shoulder in fear.....thank you brave men and woman who are in our armed forces....no matter your service and when or where, you play a role. Thank you.

After the parade we headed back to the Reids for a cookout....I just chilled with my ladies....Delaney, Chloe, Emily, Lauren, Alexa....they just love me.

We rushed home because Dad had to work some hours and I had to catch up on some sleep. So Mom and my brothers went on with an evening of computer, gardening and bathing. Then, while I was napping, I heard the beautiful soft voices of Joshua and Jonathan singing "Happy Birthday" to me.....it was sooooooo sweet and soft...Mom got most of it on video but then the battery died!.....darn than silly thing! But it was a very nice and relaxing 19 week celebration.

Day 133!

What's up ladies!?!?! Yeah, that's right. I'm not too cool to wear a "My Mommy Loves Me!" shirt. In fact it helps me make new friends when I go out dancing bare foot! Ok... it just looks like I'm "busting a move" but really I was half asleep when that picture was taken. If you want to see me really bust a move old school style then check out my latest videos! Here's some more photos of me sleeping on Mommy... my favorite place to be! We made it to church this morning and I used my "Sleepy Superpower" on Mommy and Daddy. Good thing we were all in the back row! Must have been a rough night for the three of us last night. Sorry Pastor.. we tried really hard to stay awake ... but it just wasn't happening!
We went to Gramma and Grampa's for lunch after church and then me and Mommy and Daddy went home for a nap while my brothers went to the zoo! Normally I'd be upset about missing an outing.... but man were we tired! The nap was so much better! Mommy headed off to see a friend in the hospital while me and the boys made dinner and played outside a little bit. Please pray for our friend Amanda who has an itty bitty baby in her belly and will need to be put on bedrest for the duration of her pregnancy. Now I think hanging out in bed for 6 months sounds great, but big people for some reason don't think that's as cool! I know my brothers would be going crazy after about 6 minutes! Also please be in prayer for the Webb family who had their baby girl Faith on Thursday. She too was a Trisomy 18 baby and she went home to be with God after a few hours with her family. Her website is www.caringbridge.org/visit/faithwebb.
Speaking of websites me and Daddy found a really cool new widget and added it to the sidebar. It's another map... but this one actually shows when and where people are online looking at me. So right now for instance, someone in Manila Philippines and Melbourne Australia are logged into my site! Wassup!?!?!? Isn't that cool... that I can see people on the other side of the world! Ok... they just look like little glowing astericks but... you get the idea! We wouldn't want to see the actual people... who knows what they're wearing when they log in to the internet! We don't need any pics of people in their undies popping up on my site! This is what I look like when I blog usually!

Day132!

Woo-Hoo for Saturdays. Sleeping in, no school, no work....just crazy cleaning ladies coming to the house and sparkling things up. Ok, it was just Gramma and her dear friend Bonnie but they sure did a great thing for Mommy. Since she is very busy taking care of me and my brothers and in her free time she doens't exactly want to clean (she would rather stare at me, do something with my brothers, or sleep) Bonnie and Gramma packed up their cleaning supplies and blitzed the house....they were the Merry Maids! Bonnie even made us dinner! Now, just so you know the magnitude of how thoughtful and giving this act was, Bonnie has her own cleaning lady and Gramma wishes she had her own cleaning lady! But boy was it great...it helped out soooooo much! Thank you Merry Maids!
Miss Julie (art therapist) had stopped over earlier and played with some Model Magic....Mom and her were the last two playing since they like it more than my brothers. Daddy opened up the pool only to discover that something is leaking! :( I was really looking forward to swimming in it this summer! Apparently so was Jonathan... but he didn't wait... he decided to check out Daddy's lifesaving skills! When Daddy was looking at a valve on the side of the pool Jonathan decided to try and get a bug out of the pool and it apparently was just out of his reach and ...SPLASH! Followed by a bigger SSPPLLAASSHH (Daddy-to-the-rescue!) Maybe we will be better off if the pool is broken! Man, it's only been opened one day! Anyhow... at my size, just give me an old ice cream container and I'm good for a swim! :)
To end the night I caught up on my sleep, er, I mean, American Idol... I still don't know who won...I was out on mommy's chest within 5 minutes! I don't know what my parents are going to do to get me to sleepnow that the show is over... I hope they kept some episodes for me to watch later! Off to my cozy bed!

P.S~Hey fan Nichole, check out my crib in post Day 129.

Day 131!

I had a pretty good night with Mom and Dad again. I have been sleeping through pretty well waking kind of early to be fed but I go right back to sleep in my nice cozy doll bed. Mom and I had a nice morning with Joshua and Jonathan while Daddy slept in a bit....we read books, played games, Joshua held me while Mom made breakfast....good morning! Then Mom and I headed to see Doc and Company. It was kind of crazy busy there....they are changing things around and it makes it kind of hectic. We had to wait which is something totally new to me....usually I show up and they take me right back but today we waited for a while in the waiting room and in the examining room. I weighed in at 5 lbs 14 oz. I know that you all were waiting for me to climb over that 6 lb mountain but I've had a couple of hard weeks which has required me to get off the high calorie formula that I had been used to. So don't worry... we'll get that weight back up there!
After my doctor's appointment we headed over to Great Nana's and Papa's! While I was there Uncle Jay came in to say Hi too! Great Papa just loves to fiddle and play with me... too bad Great Nana is always swishing him away! She probably just wants me all to herself!
Then we headed home to see Daddy and the boys before Daddy headed off to work. Then an unbelievable phenomenon occurred. Perhaps it was a black hole or a rip in the space time continuum. Some might say we were abducted by aliens. Others might say it was the Space Station that Gramma saw fly over her house (for real!). Maybe our overtired frazzled brains went in to auto pilot for the evening, I don't know... but it seems that none of us can recall what happened to the rest of our evening. Mommy doesn't remember. Joshua can't remember if he can remember. And Jonathan says he remembers but then just makes up silly stories! I certainly don't remember but chances are I was just asleep anyways! Who knows... you ever have one of those moments? You know you did SOMETHING but you just can't grab the memory in your brain? Oh well... whatever it was I'm sure we enjoyed it thoroughly and will treasure it forever.... if we can ever remember what it was!

p.s. I'm using my Daddy's blogger account again... sorry to confuse anyone!

Day 130!!!!

Who would have thunk....130 days!?!? Lord, thank you for all the moments here surrounded by my family, friends, and your faithful provision.

It was a good night. The three of us are working it out. I have been just waking once to eat and I am easily calmed with my paci. Dad is a bed hog like Mom said....but Mom is a cover hog like Dad said....I have my own personal space so I just let the two of them work out their issues.

I headed off to the YMCA to watch Joshua and Jonathan's Gym & Swim classes today. I met Miss Jill, the boys life guard, for the first time, as well as Miss Andrea, Joshua's substitute gym teacher, and they both just couldn't get enough of me....more girlfriends added to my blogger fanclub!...hey ladies!

When we pulled in the driveway, Busia had already made her way out here....she brought a big juicy piece of beef for lunch/dinner. Mom cooked under Busia's advising and Busia did what she is best at....loving on me! She stayed all afternoon and helped around the house. Miss Michelle came to do my massage today....I took it all in and loved every minute of it.

Gramma and Grampa came to visit and brought dinner. The boys got outside a bit and Mom got an hour nap in. Gramma gave me a bath....the last few baths I have not been real happy and this one was no exception. I yelled at her the whole time. She tried to dunk me but I was paying attention at the YMCA today and learned how to blow bubbles!...so I was ok.

I was fussy on and off all day but it was better than the last few days. I have been through so much and we all need to vent sometimes. Mom just loves me through it....and plugs me up with my paci!

Can't wait to get those pictures from my fan club members....we know those of you who bought things! Have a blessed Friday and tell someone you are glad you know them...you never know how much that may mean to someone. God Bless!

Day 129!

So I had another comfy cozy night in my baby doll crib with Mom and Dad. I awoke like a bear again though. Although, unlike yesterday, I've had more spouts of calmness. I took a nice long morning nap while Dad and the boys hung out and Mom did some running....she grocery shopped and swung by one of my NICU nurses homes (without me?!?!...I miss my girlfriends!) to do another drop of craft supplies for the posters and cards for the NICU babies....can't wait to hear about what they do with it all. I just hung out in the Snugli with Mom or Dad the rest of the day. I fussed, sucked on my paci, dozed off, had some calm time, ate and chilled.

Notice the sidebar videos are now archived so my blog doesn't take forever to load....always looking out for my fans....gotta get your quick Jacob fix and you can't do that when it takes forever to load up. You can still view them by clicking on the title link.

Mom found out today that she was over medicating me on my new reflux med!...it was an easy mistake...my old med was 2X a day....new med is just once.....oops!.....Nurse Marleen said not to worry about it but you know how Mom's are...they get feelin' all bad and guilty....Mom does a whole lot more good than bad but sometimes it is hard for her to forgive herself the bad....I looked her in the eyes, let her know I love her sooooo much, and told her I am still here and there isn't much she can do to change that....only God in the author and finisher of all life....and after what I have survived, no reflux med is takin' me out! Live & learn....now you all go check your dosing and make sure you aren't over medicating!

Well, I'm gunna jet....almost time for some grub....and only ONE med:)

Thanks to all my fans who have purchased my fanclub propaganda :) You are helping me spread God's love through this amazing life God has blessed me with... I have the best fans in the world! Don't forget to send the pictures!

REVISED: Also, all you who are really interested in the "Blessed Friends of Jacob Bread", there are starters all over the internet.....I (Dad actually) will post the word document that has the instructions for "Blessed Friends of Jacob Bread" and you can include that as you pass on your starter. Earlier I stated I would mail them out but after some talking it over with Mom and Dad, because of the bag filling with gases as the batter ferments, it probably would explode before it got to the East Coast ....what a mess of a mail box! So, until I can think of a better way of distributing it (next day delivery?) we will have to hold off on the mailing of it. Sorry for the change in plans....you guys are all my friends, bread or no bread. :)

Starter Recipe Example....search out more of them:
INGREDIENTS
1 (.25 ounce) package active dry yeast
1/4 cup warm water (110 degrees F/45 degrees C)
3 cups all-purpose flour, divided
3 cups white sugar, divided
3 cups milk
DIRECTIONS
In a small bowl, dissolve yeast in water. Let stand 10 minutes. In a 2 quart container glass, plastic or ceramic container, combine 1 cup flour and 1 cup sugar. Mix thoroughly or flour will lump when milk is added. Slowly stir in 1 cup milk and dissolved yeast mixture. Cover loosely and let stand until bubbly. Consider this day 1 of the 10 day cycle. Leave loosely covered at room temperature.
On days 2 thru 4; stir starter with a spoon. Day 5; stir in 1 cup flour, 1 cup sugar and 1 cup milk. Days 6 thru 9; stir only.
Day 10; stir in 1 cup flour, 1 cup sugar and 1 cup milk. Remove 1 cup to make your first bread, give 2 cups to friends along with this recipe, and your favorite Amish Bread recipe. Store the remaining 1 cup starter in a container in the refrigerator, or begin the 10 day process over again (beginning with step 2).
Note: Once you have made the starter, you will consider it Day One, and thus ignore step 1 in this recipe and proceed with step 2. You can also freeze this starter in 1 cup measures for later use. Frozen starter will take at least 3 hours at room temperature to thaw before using.

Download the Official Jacob Fanclub Directions Here

Day 128!

Howdy ya'll. These are my country bumpkin brothers. Pretty silly, huh?!??! Let this be a lesson to you....brush those teeth! .....once I get teeth, I will be sure to take care of them.













By Popular request, here I am in my little baby doll crib in Mom & Dad's bed. Isn't it cute?...not the manliest bed there is but it works and protects me from Mom or Dad rolling onto me. It is really cozy. I slept ok in it again up until I fussed and Mom went back on the couch with me as to not wake Daddy. This picture was taken during the day.....Mom took my picture in it to mark the one time today that I rested and was not fussy. I was quite the handful today since I would not let her put me down and I had to have my paci if I was not going to cry.....I maintained this mood for hours...all day. I just don't feel well....tired, cranky....you all know those days. So, I am going to rest some and try to be pleasant. Maybe tomorrow I will be better....Mom sure hopes so.



P.S.~ Thanks for all the "Mommy Milk" help. We are looking into a few things.

Oh, and why so few takers on the friendship bread....and you guys call yourselves my friends?!??!...junior high moment there.... Just joking...I know you love me even though you don't want to bake......this stuff is awesome though! We took the great idea of one of our fans and turned it into "Blessed Friends of Jacob Bread." We still have some so if you want it, let us know!

Posted By me, Baby Jacob, under my Dad's user name since he did the pictures for me...thanks Dad, you're the best :)

Day 127 ~ My 18 Week Birthday!

You will never guess what I slept in last night and where?!?! Mom's baby doll cradle from when she was a little girl and it was in Mom & Dad's bed! Crazy right?!??! Here I am in a pink Fisher Price doll cradle in their bed. I slept well though....must have been the pink. Mom wanted to try and sleep in a bed again but she didn't want anything to happen to me, like Daddy or Mommy rolling onto me, so we all thought we would give this a try. It is big enough for me to fit into but small enough to fit in between Mommy & Daddy's pillows. We'll see how it goes. The big thing that Mom is worried about is Dad not getting enough rest with me getting up in the night and his crazy work schedule. We'll give it a few test runs and see what happens.
Although I had a pretty restful night, I was pretty cranky all morning. My tummy was upset still and I just wanted to cry....don't you feel like just crying some days? Today was Mom's day for that too....her eyes got real leaky today....just a moody day. We all calmed down though and had a nice rest of our day. Miss Beth (child life specialist) came over to work with Joshua and Jonathan on the black & white books they are making me....they turned out really neat. Daddy and I made Amish Friendship bread....anyone want some 'cause now we need to find friends to give it to....anyone?!?!....we could even mail it since all you do it let it sit around and ferment for days on end and then it turns into yummy goodness when baked! That is what we used as my 18th birthday cake....mmmmmm delicious! Gramma & Grampa came over to celebrate my big 18 week b-day. Joshua and Jonathan were completely off the wall tonight....they sang "Happy Birthday" with shrieks and screams and yells and complete craziness.....just wait for that video. It was fun though. I was happy the rest of the night. I've been feeling ok for the most part.....I am poopin', so that is good. Mom has had to supplement my feeds a little bit with regular formula (not fortified) because her milk supply is so low.....at one point, some of you had some ideas for increasing milk supply (supplements?)....comment and let us know so I can still get the Mama-goodness.....she has increased fluids so you don't have to post that....hasn't made too much more.
2 things I forgot to tell you:
1) Friday, with all the craziness, I forgot to tell you my weigh in: 6 pounds! Ok...that was when I was "full of crap" so by Saturday, after all my poopin' I lost lots of ounces....but I still hit it!
2) I said "ma-ma" on Saturday. Mom was teasing me because I sound like a rooster all the time and Miss Teri said it was because Mom always makes those noises at me. So Mom decided to say "ma-ma" instead of funny rooster noises and guess what I said...."MA-MA!" Miss Teri was here and she witnessed it as well as Mom and Dad. They should just graduate me at the top of the class and give me my doctorate.....Docta Jake!
Well, off to the doll crib. Love the fanclub shirts??? Mom can't decide what she wants....I'll custom make her one that says "Jacob's Mom" on it or something.....she's like secretary of the fanclub so she should have her own special one.

Hug someone a little bit longer a little bit tighter.

Day 126! Big Announcement Day!

So you're all here for the big announcement right? Well... let me roll like Ryan Seacrest and make you wait until after the break.... first let me tell you about my day: We actually managed to get up and off to church this morning which was an accomplishment in itself considering I was up getting a bath to help me break my fever at 4AM last night. Way to go Mom and Dad! I'm impressed! After church Pastor Bruce and his wife Terry took us to one of Daddy's favorite restaurants: Fuddruckers! Yeah, that's right... me and Mommy and Daddy went on a date there a couple weeks back... but no one complained about going again! This time Joshua and Jonathan got to go and they had a good time playing games and buying silly things out of machines. I pretty much just sat at the table and stared around at all the pictures on the wall. (Which reminds me of the big announcement today! ... But you'll still have to wait!) After lunch we came home and everything caught up to us, so me, Mommy and Daddy went and took a nap together! It was really nice! My brothers were reading books to each other and playing in their rooms the whole time! Thank God for awesome brothers! I spiked a small fever this evening but it was nothing that Mommy couldn't handle! Gramma and Grampa came out and brought some food that their friend Bonnie made for us! Isn't that nice?!?! She's always hooking us up! The boys think she's like the Santa Clause of snack foods! I watched some TV with Mom while Daddy put the finishing touches on his basketball hoop that Nana bought him for Christmas. I'll have to get a picture of me in it or something for ya! Speaking of pictures... are you ready for the big announcement?!?!?

So you remember back a couple weeks ago when we made mention about having fanclub tshirts? Some of you really wanted them! Well we thought it would be cool to give you the opportunity to spread the word about how good God has been to me and my family and also have some fun. So we created some "Jacob Stuff" that people could order online only if they wanted to. We make absolutely no profit from any of this stuff and have put absolutely no money in to it either and you certainly don't have to buy anything. We thought that if you crazy fans do decide to get something, it might be neat to have you send in some pics of where it ends up. I think it would be great to see some of my fans out there all decked out in official Jacob Wear! You can send me a picture at babyjacobryan@gmail.com and I'll post any of the ones that we get online so we can all see! Let's see you get creative with the who, what, where and how! I mean, after all .. they got all sorts of stuff... there's even a shirt for your dog!

How cute is that! Too bad they probably don't even carry my size! (Can you be your own fan?)

The link to get Jacob Stuff is http://www.cafepress.com/jacobryanfahmer but remember, you don't have to buy anything.... if you want to just send me a picture of you standing outside the Eiffel tower holding up a napkin with my name on it then go for it! If you want to spell out my name in grilled cheese sandwiches that works too! If you can teach your parrot to sing to me, send me the video! If you happen to be in Jacobtown, Liberia, or driving down Jacobtown Road in Princeton New Jersey, take a snapshot and send it my way! Get the idea? Have fun!

Day 125!

Man am I tired! Yesterday wore me out. I think it wore Mom and Dad out a little too! Dad was up till 3 AM hanging out with me last night so that Mommy could get some rest. Here's a shot of me and Mommy getting some rest together! She never wants to leave my side! I don't blame her... I admit... I'm spoiled! Daddy can try and try to calm me down and get me to sleep to no avail and the moment he hands me to Mommy I'm ALL GOOD and usually out like a light!

Ms. Julie came to help my brothers finish up their awesome shields and bucklers. I don't know how we haven't managed to get a picture of Joshua and Jonathan with them yet. We've been kinda slackers in the picture department lately. Me and Daddy are thinking up a way that all of you can help us in that department though..... I'll tell you about it tomorrow! (Feel the suspense?)
Ms. Teri came over to visit with us for the day. She's part of the little baby fanclub too so we are tight! Remember I told you that she was born premature and was almost as small as me? Well me and Daddy have more to tell you about fanclubs .... but you'll have to wait until tomorrow! (Are you going crazy yet?)
After hanging out and playing Battleship for most of the afternoon we headed off to Jonathan's favorite restaurant again: Applebee's! I think it's becoming my favorite restaurant as well... it's definitely the one I've been to the most often! Ms. Teri bought us dinner and then came back to our house for ice cream! Me and Daddy don't have anything to tell you about ice cream tomorrow but are you on the edge of your seat about our big announcement? I was so excited about it myself tonight that I couldn't get to sleep. Daddy sent Mommy off to bed again tonight so that we could stay up late and discuss our big plans. We were up till 4AM planning this for you! Ok... at about 3 AM I spiked a 102 degree fever and Daddy had to rush and get Mommy to wipe me down and eventually give me a bath, but other than that it was all business! I handled the pacifier and Daddy handled the plans! That's how we roll!
P.S. Don't forget to check back in tomorrow for the big announcement! You'll want to be one of the first to get a head start!

Day 124 ~ "Holy" Crap

Thank you so much for your prayers for poopies. After a lot of pushing, 2 enemas, and a few doses of lactulose, I am a pooping machine.

I was quite uncomfortable when I went to the doctors. I couldn't cry because I was just concentrating on breathing. My tummy was soooooo big and it was taking up the room for my lungs. Doc sent me to get a picture of my tummy. A nice lady took me away from Mommy, strapped me to some board while I was naked and looked inside. The picture was tough to tell exactly what was wrong....we saw lots of air, some poop, and he could tell there was an obstruction....but we didn't know what. Doc called over to the ER to give them a heads up that a famous little man was going to be paying a visit so get all the cameras ready! So Mommy and I headed off to Children's Hospital ER. Mommy wouldn't take me in the waiting room because of all the fans that were swarming the doors so we had to get security! (ok maybe it was because of all the nasty viruses that people walk in the ER with and Mom didn't want me exposed to anything and a really nice lady security guard checked us in). She told them that the star had arrived and they took us right back.....now that is what I call good service....they know how to deal with super stars like me. A really nice lady asked all sorts of questions and then got us into a room. "Dr. F." introduced himself and let us know he would be helping us as well as his attending "Dr. M." and (get this) another nurse named Ann Marie!!.....does your name have to be Ann Marie to be a nurse??? Dr. F couldn't believe all the famousness that was before him so he sent me to get some more pictures....as if my outsides weren't enough to gaze upon, he had them take lots of pictures of my insides. One of my former NICU doctors came to visit me.....she was allowed through the crowd since she was one of the docs who helped me before I made the big time. She talked with Mom lots about how I was doing and let us know she's a fan as well as many of my other friends in the NICU....and she told us about all the great posters that are up in the NICU using the materials we donated. It was great....she stuck around for the x-ray results.....I was full of crap.... we all knew I was a jokester but who really thought I was actually full of it?!?! These new pics showed that my whole tummy was poopies and there was some really hard stuff (27 cal formula???) blocking the way. I just couldn't stop pushing. "Great" Aunt Linda fought her way through the screaming fans (ok maybe they had some kind of trauma that caused the screaming???) and helped Mom out. She got Mom food, let her go potty, held me while Mom wrote down questions and spoke with the doctors....Mom sure was glad she was there to help. Nurse Ann Marie came in with this water gun and shot me right in the butt!....I was not going to let her get away with it that easy so I shot it all back at her.....but then she got me back and it stuck for a while. It started cleaning me out slow at first.....I just kept pushing and pushing.....and I got tired.....it was too much for me and my oxygen levels went down....PLUS I hadn't eaten in lots of hours....they were worried about my stats. Mom was worried too because she knew I just needed to get cleaned out but she didn't want it to put me into distress and it cause me to not make it through another day.....the staff said they would admit me and keep an eye on me and poke me (give me an IV) to make sure I was hydrated but Mom wasn't sure about the poking part (GO MOM!) and she also wants me to be home, free of wires and noisy alarms if God does take me....it was a tough decision for her but with guidance from family, nurses and doctors, she decided she could treat me at home....lucky thing for those nurses 'cause there was LOTS of poopies comin' out late into the night. They fed me a bit, hit me with another water gun (I was too tired to play) so I would loosen up more below and then, Nurse Sara took over and they hit me from above with seaweed green liquid called lactulose....should just call that stuff Drano....now we got the flow on! I passed lots of hard stuff, my stats stayed up and they started instructing Mom of what to do for me. Got a script for more seaweed juice and lots of diapers. I made it home ok and now I am just poopin' like crazy. My tummy aches a bit but it feels better than being stopped up.....at least I can cry because there is starting to get more room in my belly......I'll work through it. I am being fed just breastmilk and my meds until we get through this and then we'll take it from there.

Thanks again for all the poopy prayers....that makes it "holy" crap! Keep it up!...it's working. Just pray for continued strength to get through this "crappy" time! HA! Thanks!

P.S.~ I know I missed day 123...I'll get to it later. Thanks for understanding.

Just A Quick Update

As everyone is exhausted from their 12 hour ordeal I'll make this short. Jacob is home and resting somewhat comfortably. The treatments at the hospital have apparently helped him poop some and we'll be keeping a close eye on him from home. Thank you all for your continued prayers and support. Please continue to pray that Jacob returns to, or finds a new "normal." Also pray for Karen as she had a pretty long day at "the doctor's office." We'll keep you posted!

Please Be In Prayer For Jacob

I just got notice from Karen that during his routine weekly checkup at his pediatrician's Jacob was sent to get an xray because of the fact that he had lots of air in his belly and hasn't pooped in a couple of days. They believe there may be an obstruction in his intestines and they are probably going to end up sending him to Children's Hospital Emergency Room for more testing. They're not sure if his bowels are twisted or if there's something in them blocking them up. I'm currently at home with the older boys and will have to decide if I head out to the hospital or not as well. Thanks for your prayers for our little angel!

Day 123!

So to be honest, I'm actually writing about this day 3 days later... and since I'm incredibly honest, I don't remember much of what happened! Sorry. I wasn't feeling well this whole week... and I know that people all over the world want to know what I did, but the whole day is pretty much a fog for me now. I do remember that Ms. Michelle came over and gave me a massage and that was wonderful.... but even then I just kinda layed there zoned out! I know that you all love hearing about my days, so I'll try to be better at updating more regularly! I also know that if I don't that Nana in Texas is going to worry and we can't have that!

Day 122! ~ HAPPY 4 MONTH BIRTHDAY!

4 MONTHS! 4 MONTHS! 4 MonThS!!!!! Can you believe it??? Mommy and Daddy can't. They watched that last video of my days and they said all those pictures seemed so long ago. 4 months I have been in this world when so many t-18 babies are not promised a breath. Thank you Lord not only for 4 months but for every breath.

Still no poopies. We are trying. Not much you can do for a little guy like me in this category. I'll get it. Just keep praying. I need a stinky day.....one with poop, that is!

Ok...so for my 4 month birthday we hung out at home lots. I stayed home with Dad and helped on my newest video (check it out if you can) while Mom took Joshua and Jonathan to their friend's house. They had such a good time playing with Rachel, Elizabeth and Noel that they didn't want to leave! But they did since they love me and can't stay away from me!......they will see them again at gym & swim and maybe get together another time. I tend to keep them cooped up here at home a bit so it is good for them to get out. We had some lunch together and hung out at home...all us boys snoozed....good day for snoozin'. Daddy went of to work and we headed outside for some fresh air. It began to rain a tiny bit but Mom and I sat under a tree (Mom called it God's umbrella) and we didn't get a drop on us while Joshua and Jonathan played in the Magic Clubhouse. Aunt Linda, Alyssa, and Gramma came over for a pizza party! We ate, sang on cookies sent by Bonnie (thank you!) and I just snuggled with my "Great" Aunt Linda....."great" is right... she was really calming and comfy and "great" to be around....good times.....or "great" times....Oh, "great"...I used "great" a "great" number of times.... Over all it was a "great" day:). Here's a shot of the "Prayer Bear" that Alyssa brought me! Isn't he cute??