Within minutes of Jacob passing away, during my crazed scramble to try and revive him and call the nurses and such, Joshua grabbed a pencil and started this drawing. It started off as the picture of Jacob and the "DED" arrow. When I saw it I said, "Oh buddy... why don't you draw him in heaven or something." At which point he added me and him on the bottom right "crying because Jacob was gone" and the arrow to show Jacob up in heaven. To be honest, I'm not really sure what's going on up there in heaven... :) ... some kind of door or something. It reminds me of what Jesus said in John 10: "Truly, truly, I say to you, he who does not enter by the door into the fold of the sheep, but climbs up some other way, he is a thief and a robber. But he who enters by the door is a shepherd of the sheep. To him the doorkeeper opens, and the sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he puts forth all his own, he goes ahead of them, and the sheep follow him because they know his voice. A stranger they simply will not follow, but will flee from him, because they do not know the voice of strangers. This figure of speech Jesus spoke to them, but they did not understand what those things were which He had been saying to them. So Jesus said to them again, "Truly, truly, I say to you, I am the door of the sheep. All who came before Me are thieves and robbers, but the sheep did not hear them. I am the door; if anyone enters through Me, he will be saved, and will go in and out and find pasture. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. I am the good shepherd; the good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep. He who is a hired hand, and not a shepherd, who is not the owner of the sheep, sees the wolf coming, and leaves the sheep and flees, and the wolf snatches them and scatters them. He flees because he is a hired hand and is not concerned about the sheep. I am the good shepherd, and I know My own and My own know Me, even as the Father knows Me and I know the Father; and I lay down My life for the sheep. I have other sheep, which are not of this fold; I must bring them also, and they will hear My voice; and they will become one flock with one shepherd. For this reason the Father loves Me, because I lay down My life so that I may take it again. No one has taken it away from Me, but I lay it down on My own initiative I have authority to lay it down, and I have authority to take it up again This commandment I received from My Father."
I love the fact that when Jesus spoke and no one understood that He took the time to explain it to them again in a different way. It gives me hope that Jesus will continue to teach me through this time of pain and some day help me to understand it fully.
5 comments:
Jesus continues to speak! He has spoken loudly through your family! I pray that He will comfort you now and always and I pray that He will make His purpose known to you. Jacob's life was filled with so much purpose! Thank you for sharing his life with so many! I'll be praying!
I have checked in here daily for longer than I can remember. It has been eleven months since my baby girl went to Heaven and yet the raw truth in Jacob's brother's drawing just blesses my heart. We don't know what's going on in Heaven. We do know that we were left crying. And we do need to know that our Shepherd will take the time to talk us through the hard, hard days to come. I can only speak for the eleven months and six days I have endured as a mother with a child in Heaven, but what I can say is that you will learn more of your Father than you ever dreamed you might. And whatever you were before Jacob will be intensified in the days to come, your relationship with your Lord and the peace He gives will become "deeper" somehow. Please continue to write. Well over 250 blog entries have come since I stood where you are and there are no words to describe the way my Lord has used my own "voice" to speak to me and to bring healing where I thought there could be none. We, your readers and fans of Jacob Ryan Fahmer, will continue to shoulder this cross with you, to come here each day and support you, but most importanty of all, we will not fail to lift your name to your God. You have been given much and thus, have much to grieve. But this is not the end... if little Jacob could talk to you now, as He will someday soon, he would tell you of things you cannot begin to fathom. Thank you for letting his little life send ripples all across our world, for all eternity. You honor your Father and your son well.
I prya that you continue to unerstand things more and more. You are amazing.
What a great, merciful and graceful God we serve that he takes the time with us...His created and cherished.
Fahmer Family,
I am continuing to pray for all of you as mourn your sweet Jacob. I will pray that the Lord will bless you with abundant wisdom as you continue to minister to each other, but especially to your precious Joshua and Jonathan. Also, I know that so many of us have commented that you are such an inspiration, and are amazing, graceful, wise, etc. and you are! But none of us expects you to be perfect, you are human and grieving. I hope we haven't made you feel that you must always live up to those high standards, and that we will be disappointed if you fall short of them. We won't love you any less. I just don't want you to feel pressured to "show a good face" when you are in such a difficult place right now. If you feel less than perfect and need to express it, please do so.
with lots of love and prayers - Cheryl
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